So very fucking tired
of these walls this bed these shoes
which aren’t old enough to talk
yet not new enough to wonder.
And, were I a tramp,
I’d tie my bandana tight
and talk big enough that,
were I alone? Even the moon;
she’d have to listen.
Hell
I’d probably even have more friends than I do now.
-J. Sheetz
we fucked
in a dream last night
and I woke up more tired that I was
when I went to sleep the night before
but I’m not going to write you back
because if I can have those dreams that fast
one of us will get hurt
-J.Sheetz
I wish I could write for you
the songs you deserve
but my guitar strings are rusted
and I don’t have the money to replace
them.
And what’s worse
is that you just might
understand the lyrics,
and we can’t have that.
-J. Sheetz
Between the buildings at the corner of 9th
was your favorite place to hide. Most of the time
I liked to walk real slow to the spot you would take.
I know it always made you happy to think you chose a
good place. And thank God for that watch you got me on
mt first Christmas here. It would be years before I
learned to tell time, but I could at least use the hands
to tell me when I could stand and try to find you when
we played hide and go seek. On your 15th birthday you
told me that you family was planning on moving. We
celebrated anyway by going down to the state line and
skating on the tracks. Goddamn you should have seen that
cops face when you threw that rock at him but you were
too afraid to stop running and went all the way back
between the buildings at the corner of 9th. You called me
years later to tell me that your parents were mistreating
you. They never knew what was good for us. They never
knew what it was like to be a kid today.
But now we’ve found better ways to hide. In basements in-between
days and at the bottom of ashtrays. It was strange how we
always had money to spend on those days. Goddamn it’s been
years since I last thought of you. I never knew you’d find
a better place to hide than between the buildings at the
corner of 9th. You can come out now.
You can blame it on the alcohol
or cigars
but in truth I was always bound to fall,
and I knew the stars didn’t give a flat fuck
about me or you
and eventually we’ll get stuck in-between days and in outlying ways
and with nothing to pull us through.
-J. Sheetz
